Some musings on relationships :o)

The oldest guy who I ever slept with was 41; he was an artist who made the local newspaper, he invited me over because he was feeling lonely, (worst kisser of my life); the youngest was 18 (he’s a Marine who wants to be an artist, oddly enough) was (and is) an amazing guy. I keep in touch with the Marine, sporadically, but it’s nice to know he’s doing well.

The first time I had sex was when I was 19, he was 36, he was a bartender. I found myself on the floor of the bar a few weeks after dating (seeing?) him regularly…I’m not really sure what to call it, but whatever it was, he was my first Gay Kiss…he was a lot of firsts actually. He was six foot two, in good shape, I had to stand on my toes to kiss him (I’m 5′ 5″)…he was an awesome kisser; made second only by Vince who set the bar high. The ride was fun while it lasted and I’m glad it happened because it was an experience and it’s something I can look back at with a smile.

Vince was the best ride of my life (to date) and he’s the guy who set the bar for me, for what a good kiss should feel like (he would lock his lips with mine, squeeze me against him, as he sucked the air out of my chest, into him, and breathe it out his nose). He would also toss me around like I was a rag doll, it was amazing. In bed, He’d wrap his body tight around mine at night and not allow me to move…I got used to the smell of his deodorant, because he kept my in the crook of his arm when he wasn’t wrapped around me from behind…when he was, his chin would be over my shoulder, and we would become a knot of arms and legs.

And as I look back over the guys with whom I’ve had encounters and relations with, I’ve been lucky, because I’ve had no regrets…even relationships that didn’t last, have all gone right…and I think I’m pretty blessed because of it.

However, I think it was also really good to get a range of ages in, because it let me find what I like and while I’m still attracted to guys who are older than me (being younger than me is definitely a turn off) I’ve found that I feel most comfortable with people who are no more than around five-ish years older than I am…so guys who are 27 usually fit the bill (at this point in time)

…however, there are always those exceptions to the rule (which I why I try not to make rules, but guidlines) that walk by once you think you’ve got everything figured out…he’s older, and in shape…and has an accent that makes me weak and a Hugh Grant attraction that I can’t even begin to describe…he’s tall…I come up to his chest…and that one catch, that ruins the potential for everything…is that he’s painfully, painfully straight…which is fine, because I’m moving out of this country come hell or high water so while I don’t want a relationship (now) it would, however, have been nice if I could look and touch, however (sadly) for this adonis…museum rules apply.

Ahh, musings.

Now, bed…then paper, then laundry…then freedom…

Some musings on relationships :o)

The oldest guy who I ever slept with was 41; he was an artist who made the local newspaper, he invited me over because he was feeling lonely, (worst kisser of my life); the youngest was 18 (he’s a Marine who wants to be an artist, oddly enough) was (and is) an amazing guy. I keep in touch with the Marine, sporadically, but it’s nice to know he’s doing well.

The first time I had sex was when I was 19, he was 36, he was a bartender. I found myself on the floor of the bar a few weeks after dating (seeing?) him regularly…I’m not really sure what to call it, but whatever it was, he was my first Gay Kiss…he was a lot of firsts actually. He was six foot two, in good shape, I had to stand on my toes to kiss him (I’m 5′ 5″)…he was an awesome kisser; made second only by Vince who set the bar high. The ride was fun while it lasted and I’m glad it happened because it was an experience and it’s something I can look back at with a smile.

Vince was the best ride of my life (to date) and he’s the guy who set the bar for me, for what a good kiss should feel like (he would lock his lips with mine, squeeze me against him, as he sucked the air out of my chest, into him, and breathe it out his nose). He would also toss me around like I was a rag doll, it was amazing. In bed, He’d wrap his body tight around mine at night and not allow me to move…I got used to the smell of his deodorant, because he kept my in the crook of his arm when he wasn’t wrapped around me from behind…when he was, his chin would be over my shoulder, and we would become a knot of arms and legs.

And as I look back over the guys with whom I’ve had encounters and relations with, I’ve been lucky, because I’ve had no regrets…even relationships that didn’t last, have all gone right…and I think I’m pretty blessed because of it.

However, I think it was also really good to get a range of ages in, because it let me find what I like and while I’m still attracted to guys who are older than me (being younger than me is definitely a turn off) I’ve found that I feel most comfortable with people who are no more than around five-ish years older than I am…so guys who are 27 usually fit the bill (at this point in time)

…however, there are always those exceptions to the rule (which I why I try not to make rules, but guidlines) that walk by once you think you’ve got everything figured out…he’s older, and in shape…and has an accent that makes me weak and a Hugh Grant attraction that I can’t even begin to describe…he’s tall…I come up to his chest…and that one catch, that ruins the potential for everything…is that he’s painfully, painfully straight…which is fine, because I’m moving out of this country come hell or high water so while I don’t want a relationship (now) it would, however, have been nice if I could look and touch, however (sadly) for this adonis…museum rules apply.

Ahh, musings.

Now, bed…then paper, then laundry…then freedom…

Israel, Masters Degree, Papers, Classes & Things…

Israel

29 Days until I leave for Israel, 18 Days until Toronto for AN/YN; 6 Days until I leave for NYC, 4 Days until Thursday which is when I get to hand in my paper (which, I’ve decided, will be completed and bound before I go to bed tomorrow) and my world is spinning.

So far I’ve sent out four invoices totaling $169.00; how much of that money I’ll see before I head out to Israel this summer remains uncertain, but at least it’s progress. Shirah (stoicdaydreamer) was able to find me the free hostel in Jerusalem, I sent them an email a few day sago which they haven’t returned so I’ll call them next week if I still don’t hear from them.

I can’t begin to tell you how excited I am to be able to walk into Jerusalem…for so, so many reasons. I’m currently making my walking soundtrack (which means I also need to download some of the music from the movie Kingdom of Heaven with Orlando Bloom – he had, awesome pecs in the movie, as an aside and the soundtrack was great too).

I found a website called Gay Middle East and they have an Israel Page which doesn’t have too much information on it; however they granted me access to their Yahoo Groups Mailing List which is incredibly active (and incredibly multi-national) so hopefully that will provide for some networking opportunities as well. Also from a friend of mine in Cairo I’ve been told that Gay Underground parties are popping up at the U.S. Hotel Chains there just under different names, so they’re not being advertised as Gay but that’s who their clientele is (and at least it’s progress).

This whole waiting game is rather frustrating though. Not that I want to ‘wish my life away’ as it were, but a speeding up the last leg of the process so I can get my B.A., get my application into the Aliyah Organization and get out of here would be lovely…I love UB and I love the friends I’ve made here; but I’ve been here way, way too long.

Masters Degree

So while speaking with Itai (nir1) earlier today I found out that if I’m accepted at TAU (and this is the point where I remind you, that sometime in the future when I apply, I’d appreciate it if you’d all cross your fingers for me) after I apply; it is roughly 1,400.00US per year.

Now, a Masters Program in Linguistics normally takes two years (from what I’ve heard from my friends in the Masters Degree Program in Linguistics at UB, there is no reason for it to take longer); even if the cost were to be raised to $2,000.00 a year or even if it took me three years at $1,400.00; that is still a savings of around $32,000-40,000.00 in comparison to what I would be looking at in the U.S (even at a State School).

I cannot begin to tell you how much this lowers my stress levels and how relieved I am (a large part of my worry was how I was going to pay for grad school in Israel); but I can certainly raise the $4,000.00~ that it will require to get my Masters Degree. $4,000.00 for an M.A. is cheap as dirt, if not cheaper.

Itai was also the one who showed me the website for the Givat Haviva program; which I’ve been researching intensively since he’s shown it to me (I’ve been looking for an Intensive Arabic Program for a year and a half now, ever since my first semester of Arabic at UB). While I am not fully convinced (yet) of all that I’ve heard about their successes (I’m a New Yorker, we’re skeptical about most things by nature and we’re most skeptical when someone says that they can provide a service that works) I believe that I’ll know better how I feel about them after I meet them and look around their place of instruction sometime this summer. However, if they can provide me with the level and intensity of education that their website claims they can, even without being able to bring their me to fluency, it is still well worth the $5,000.00 for that many hours of instruction.

The other two programs which I found in the U.S. that are ‘intensive’ were both poorly rated by people whom I met who attended them, specifically the Defense Language Institute which got poor marks from Prof. Roustum. Prof. Roustum invited one of their graduates who was in town, into our class to give us a presentation. After he left Prof. Roustum explained to us (given that we’re guppies in comparison to pretty much anyone else who’s studied the language and have no way to judge) just how poorly he did…and he was, so we were told, one of their shining stars. So I’m holding out a lot of hope that the program in Tel Aviv is as good as they say it is; if it isn’t, I’ll have to keep looking (Cowboy Bebop fans are the only one who’ll get this: I’ve been playing Mushroom Hunting/Mushroom Samba while I’ve been paging through programs).

But, I am relived. I can afford an investment of around 9,000.00 to 10,000.00 for a Masters Degree in Linguistics and a Fluency in Arabic (considering that I’m paying for everything after UB on my own). And that kind of education is an incredible investment with great potential for capital return. I was talking about it with Scott Paauw the other day, and in the U.S. (currently) people with those credentials can essentially write their own tickets. I’ve found that most people from the Middle East (who I’ve met both in person and online) have no idea what the market currently is for Translators of Arabic; but I can tell you (from both information that I’ve received from the ATA, job fairs and other venues as of this year) that there’s a high demand and very, very low supply in the U.S. (and with opportunities to work over the internet, so you don’t even have to leave your home it means that you can bask in the glory of a beach while telecommuting from Tel Aviv to New York).

My future is certainly looking up and considering I’ll be making the move when I’m 23, if I can have my Masters and a fluency in either Hebrew or Arabic (or, hopefully both as the plan is) by the time I’m 27; I’ll be a happy, happy camper…if it takes me longer for fluency that’s fine (I’ll be an excited camper), but even so…my train is right on schedule.

Papers, Classes & Things

I’ll be so happy when this paper is turned in. Not only because it will be done; but because it’s cool…it’s really, really cool (and it means I get to meet with Wolf whom I haven’t really gotten to see in a couple of weeks). What makes this more exciting, is that I was able to work in Alphasignal, Parasignal, Infrasignal: Notes Toward a Theory of Communication by Dunn & Crawford which is something that I think he’ll find incredibly interesting as a further reading from my bibliography and works cited page. It’s a great paper that has a lot of implications for a few fields (among them: photography, translatology, critical discourse analysis and if you give it to a pack of Semanticians a copy of the paper, you can watch them fight over it like dogs over a steak).

Game Plan

I’m going to sleep until 12:30PM EST; then make my way to campus; I’ll get coffee, then I’ll sit in the same spot in front of a computer until the paper is done. Then I’ll come home, and do laundry.

Okay, ready…break!

Israel, Masters Degree, Papers, Classes & Things…

Israel

29 Days until I leave for Israel, 18 Days until Toronto for AN/YN; 6 Days until I leave for NYC, 4 Days until Thursday which is when I get to hand in my paper (which, I’ve decided, will be completed and bound before I go to bed tomorrow) and my world is spinning.

So far I’ve sent out four invoices totaling $169.00; how much of that money I’ll see before I head out to Israel this summer remains uncertain, but at least it’s progress. Shirah (stoicdaydreamer) was able to find me the free hostel in Jerusalem, I sent them an email a few day sago which they haven’t returned so I’ll call them next week if I still don’t hear from them.

I can’t begin to tell you how excited I am to be able to walk into Jerusalem…for so, so many reasons. I’m currently making my walking soundtrack (which means I also need to download some of the music from the movie Kingdom of Heaven with Orlando Bloom – he had, awesome pecs in the movie, as an aside and the soundtrack was great too).

I found a website called Gay Middle East and they have an Israel Page which doesn’t have too much information on it; however they granted me access to their Yahoo Groups Mailing List which is incredibly active (and incredibly multi-national) so hopefully that will provide for some networking opportunities as well. Also from a friend of mine in Cairo I’ve been told that Gay Underground parties are popping up at the U.S. Hotel Chains there just under different names, so they’re not being advertised as Gay but that’s who their clientele is (and at least it’s progress).

This whole waiting game is rather frustrating though. Not that I want to ‘wish my life away’ as it were, but a speeding up the last leg of the process so I can get my B.A., get my application into the Aliyah Organization and get out of here would be lovely…I love UB and I love the friends I’ve made here; but I’ve been here way, way too long.

Masters Degree

So while speaking with Itai (nir1) earlier today I found out that if I’m accepted at TAU (and this is the point where I remind you, that sometime in the future when I apply, I’d appreciate it if you’d all cross your fingers for me) after I apply; it is roughly 1,400.00US per year.

Now, a Masters Program in Linguistics normally takes two years (from what I’ve heard from my friends in the Masters Degree Program in Linguistics at UB, there is no reason for it to take longer); even if the cost were to be raised to $2,000.00 a year or even if it took me three years at $1,400.00; that is still a savings of around $32,000-40,000.00 in comparison to what I would be looking at in the U.S (even at a State School).

I cannot begin to tell you how much this lowers my stress levels and how relieved I am (a large part of my worry was how I was going to pay for grad school in Israel); but I can certainly raise the $4,000.00~ that it will require to get my Masters Degree. $4,000.00 for an M.A. is cheap as dirt, if not cheaper.

Itai was also the one who showed me the website for the Givat Haviva program; which I’ve been researching intensively since he’s shown it to me (I’ve been looking for an Intensive Arabic Program for a year and a half now, ever since my first semester of Arabic at UB). While I am not fully convinced (yet) of all that I’ve heard about their successes (I’m a New Yorker, we’re skeptical about most things by nature and we’re most skeptical when someone says that they can provide a service that works) I believe that I’ll know better how I feel about them after I meet them and look around their place of instruction sometime this summer. However, if they can provide me with the level and intensity of education that their website claims they can, even without being able to bring their me to fluency, it is still well worth the $5,000.00 for that many hours of instruction.

The other two programs which I found in the U.S. that are ‘intensive’ were both poorly rated by people whom I met who attended them, specifically the Defense Language Institute which got poor marks from Prof. Roustum. Prof. Roustum invited one of their graduates who was in town, into our class to give us a presentation. After he left Prof. Roustum explained to us (given that we’re guppies in comparison to pretty much anyone else who’s studied the language and have no way to judge) just how poorly he did…and he was, so we were told, one of their shining stars. So I’m holding out a lot of hope that the program in Tel Aviv is as good as they say it is; if it isn’t, I’ll have to keep looking (Cowboy Bebop fans are the only one who’ll get this: I’ve been playing Mushroom Hunting/Mushroom Samba while I’ve been paging through programs).

But, I am relived. I can afford an investment of around 9,000.00 to 10,000.00 for a Masters Degree in Linguistics and a Fluency in Arabic (considering that I’m paying for everything after UB on my own). And that kind of education is an incredible investment with great potential for capital return. I was talking about it with Scott Paauw the other day, and in the U.S. (currently) people with those credentials can essentially write their own tickets. I’ve found that most people from the Middle East (who I’ve met both in person and online) have no idea what the market currently is for Translators of Arabic; but I can tell you (from both information that I’ve received from the ATA, job fairs and other venues as of this year) that there’s a high demand and very, very low supply in the U.S. (and with opportunities to work over the internet, so you don’t even have to leave your home it means that you can bask in the glory of a beach while telecommuting from Tel Aviv to New York).

My future is certainly looking up and considering I’ll be making the move when I’m 23, if I can have my Masters and a fluency in either Hebrew or Arabic (or, hopefully both as the plan is) by the time I’m 27; I’ll be a happy, happy camper…if it takes me longer for fluency that’s fine (I’ll be an excited camper), but even so…my train is right on schedule.

Papers, Classes & Things

I’ll be so happy when this paper is turned in. Not only because it will be done; but because it’s cool…it’s really, really cool (and it means I get to meet with Wolf whom I haven’t really gotten to see in a couple of weeks). What makes this more exciting, is that I was able to work in Alphasignal, Parasignal, Infrasignal: Notes Toward a Theory of Communication by Dunn & Crawford which is something that I think he’ll find incredibly interesting as a further reading from my bibliography and works cited page. It’s a great paper that has a lot of implications for a few fields (among them: photography, translatology, critical discourse analysis and if you give it to a pack of Semanticians a copy of the paper, you can watch them fight over it like dogs over a steak).

Game Plan

I’m going to sleep until 12:30PM EST; then make my way to campus; I’ll get coffee, then I’ll sit in the same spot in front of a computer until the paper is done. Then I’ll come home, and do laundry.

Okay, ready…break!

It’s really, really windy outside…

wow it’s windy outside; however it’s really nice because I’ve been able to leave all of the windows in my apartment open to air the place out so the winter smell is thankfully gone and it smells fresh and spring like now :o)

Day II of the Box Sale..we’ll see how it goes

I didn’t get to watch Spring Time last night, so I’ll be watching it in about an hour once I get the last things settled in the apartment and vacuum once more.

It’s really, really windy outside…

wow it’s windy outside; however it’s really nice because I’ve been able to leave all of the windows in my apartment open to air the place out so the winter smell is thankfully gone and it smells fresh and spring like now :o)

Day II of the Box Sale..we’ll see how it goes

I didn’t get to watch Spring Time last night, so I’ll be watching it in about an hour once I get the last things settled in the apartment and vacuum once more.

Flashback to 1989

I think it speaks wonders that in Kindergarten this was my favorite song. Ms. Feigenbaum had us do a dance to it…all I really remember is getting to do this at the end of year Kindergarten BBQ again after we learned it in class a few weeks prior, and I was thrilled. I was just thinking about life and letting my mind wander this evening, and I realized I was humming it to myself so I Limewire-ed it and I now share the lyrics with you:

Hands Up
by Ottawan
album:

Hands up, baby, hands up,
Gimme your heart, gimme, gimme your heart
Gimme gimme
Hands up, baby, hands up,
Gimme your heart, gimme, gimme your heart
Gimme gimme
All your love,
All your love.

Angel face, I love your smile,
Love your ways, I like your style.
What can I do to get closer to you?
Don’t think twice or count to ten.
Don’t take advice, don’t ask me when.
Just come my way, simply kiss me and say:

Hands up, baby, hands up, …

With your head up in the sky,
Every day you’re walkin’ by,
Why don’t you have the stars looking at me?

Stop that game, don’t waste your time,
For all your dreams are matchin’ mine,
No use to play hide n seek for a week.

Hands up, baby, hands up, …

Let me be your Romeo, your wonder boy,
And your super champ.
Let me take you to the milky way
On a holiday, (on a holiday)
Follow me (follow me)
why don’t you follow me (why don’t you follow me)?
Just come my way simply kiss me and say:

Hands up, baby, hands up, …

Flashback to 1989

I think it speaks wonders that in Kindergarten this was my favorite song. Ms. Feigenbaum had us do a dance to it…all I really remember is getting to do this at the end of year Kindergarten BBQ again after we learned it in class a few weeks prior, and I was thrilled. I was just thinking about life and letting my mind wander this evening, and I realized I was humming it to myself so I Limewire-ed it and I now share the lyrics with you:

Hands Up
by Ottawan
album:

Hands up, baby, hands up,
Gimme your heart, gimme, gimme your heart
Gimme gimme
Hands up, baby, hands up,
Gimme your heart, gimme, gimme your heart
Gimme gimme
All your love,
All your love.

Angel face, I love your smile,
Love your ways, I like your style.
What can I do to get closer to you?
Don’t think twice or count to ten.
Don’t take advice, don’t ask me when.
Just come my way, simply kiss me and say:

Hands up, baby, hands up, …

With your head up in the sky,
Every day you’re walkin’ by,
Why don’t you have the stars looking at me?

Stop that game, don’t waste your time,
For all your dreams are matchin’ mine,
No use to play hide n seek for a week.

Hands up, baby, hands up, …

Let me be your Romeo, your wonder boy,
And your super champ.
Let me take you to the milky way
On a holiday, (on a holiday)
Follow me (follow me)
why don’t you follow me (why don’t you follow me)?
Just come my way simply kiss me and say:

Hands up, baby, hands up, …

Hair, Phone, NYC, Shows and More :o)

My hair is finally growing back in (the picture was taken pre-coffee and pre-caffeine, it’s been a slow-start kind of morning) however, shortly I’ll have my hair long enough to not only get a hair cut, but once again get highlights and lowlights.

Phone

Wow, it’s been a busy morning on the phone, it’s been going off non-stop since about 11; and I got one “request you call” via the internet which I followed up on to get it out of the way.

The girl who wanted me to call her wasn’t terribly pleased with my answer though (she’s from the Linguistics Department and sent me a message through the UBULS page). Apparently her boyfriend had to go to Synagogue for services for a class (I’m assuming American Pluralism where we’re all supposed to learn how to get along and love each other), and apparently procrastinated hard core…well services (for what he needs) are held Friday Nights and Saturday Mornings (I don’t think Havdalah would meet his class requirements) and she sent me the message Saturday around 12:00PM so that ruled anything he could do for credit out until next Friday. So I gave her the names of some of the local synagogues that I’m familiar with and hopefully her boyfriend can stand to wait until next Friday to get his paper done.

Mom & Dad called, they were driving into NYC to see the show Inherit the Wind which is about the Scopes Trial (from what I’ve read and heard, it’s got fantastic reviews) and Dad wanted to know when I was coming home for his Award’s Dinner being put on by the UJA (I’ll be flying out to NYC on the 12th of this month) because apparently the owner of the security firm he contracts with to investigate/background check his employees wants to show me some stuff and go over some things with me which should be pretty neat. I sit for the P.I. exam the middle of July, which means I have to go back over the case law and NYS Code and review it. The IAPP’s CIPP exam is also coming up (sometime after August) so I also need to review for that as well…one day, I think a show about a Linguistic Detective should be made…not that I’m biased or anything, but I think it’d be pretty hot.

Chris (gryvon) called and we’re going to get set to start our round of judging on the AMV Entries for Anime north Tonight at around 7pm so that’s going to be cool and Jacqueline (hollow_voice) called to invite me to lunch tomorrow and there’s been a few other calls which aren’t really of note, so I’m not noting them.

More :o)

The rest of this month really is shaping up to be quite busy. I’d actually be home at this point, save for the fact that I have to meet with Dr. Wölk on the 10th. However:

I’ll be home on the 12th through the 19th attending Dad’s Awards Dinner. I’ll be in Toronto on the 20th with Chris (gryvon) for the last staff meeting before Anime North/Yaoi North (we’re expecting anywhere from 15,000 to 16,000 attendees this year); then we’re back up in Toronto from the 24th through the 28th. I fly back to NYC/LI on May 31st and then I leave for Israel on June 5th (which, happens to be in 30 days!).

I’m excited, it appears that I’ll be able to make the walk into Jerusalem (40 miles is nothing); I was discussing it with Mom (who acts as my base station and check in point when I’m Snow Shoeing or Hiking in Vermont) and she wasn’t concerned about the rockiness or the terrain, just mostly about the heat which shouldn’t be too much to handle with proper clothing and some water bottles.

RKO

I got Jackie’s (iolausian)’s package today!! This is movie 3 in my RKO Education! I’m excited, I’m going to watch it after we judge the AMVs. I’m not sure if I enjoy the RKO films because of the amazing dance numbers, or the wonderful, tawdry, dirty ways they got around the censors (so much innuendo…).

Stuff n’ Things

I really, really need to wash my hoodie…it’s getting grungy…tonight appears to also be a Laundry night.

As far as this week goes: I plan on completing my paper for Dr. Wölk, then editing it on Monday, Ignoring it on Tuesday, Looking at it again, more critically on Wednesday, and turning it in on Thursday.

Time for more coffee…peace 😀