July 2006

an I.V. is NOT Gin…I know THAT much…

moocowinthecity 2006-07-21 No Comments

Subject: an I.V. is NOT Gin…I know THAT much…

Date: Friday 7/21/06 12:48:00 AM

Location: Plainview, Long Island, New York

Okay, so I go for my CAT Scan and it required contrast.

The way that Zwanger-Pesiri does the contrast is they put into your arm essentially what amounts to a temporary shunt (at least, that’s what I *think* it is, sparks27 can probably correct me if there’s a better term) and they inject some liquid into your vein and I’m not really sure how it works from there but they tell me it works so take it as you will.

However what I thought was entertaining is that the nurse was assuming I’d freak out at the needle (after two large tattoos, multiple piercings, needles don’t really scare me all that much) so when she realized I wasn’t freaking out she was like “So…when we hook you up to the IV it may warm you up a bit…actually, it’ll feel just like you took a swig of gin okay honey?” and I was like “um…., yeah, okay…swig of gin, sure, no problemo” so anyways, they put the shunty thing in (these are, of course, the technical terms) and I get put on the CAT Scan bed and they hook up the I.V. and yes, I felt warm…but I can certainly say that the feeling was not that feeling you get after a nice swig of gin.

Anyways, they did the CAT Scan, it took about thirty minutes (in, out) and I was done.

The other interesting observation is that my doctor took blood from my right arm and where he took blood looks like I was punched by a football player. The nurse who inserted and removed (with literally, no pain) an IV Shunt in my left arm left no mark, that arm you can barely see the tiny red dot.

Lesson Learned (though learned before): Always let a nurse, over a doctor, draw blood.

Winners in the ‘Guess WTF nomadmatan  Has’ Contest

Eli (who’s ‘too cool’ to get an LJ name and thinks I make my Resh like my Dalet and I don’t…except in block print…but who the hell uses that anyway) says he thought it was the ‘Kissing Virus’ but claims that he didn’t know we call it that in this country as well.

blue02dude who says he really did think I had mono, but didn’t post it.

sparks27 who says the same as blue02dude

Bev (who doesn’t use LJ) who told Leslie that she thought it must be Mono after I hung up with her last Sunday on my way to NYC.

Build a Bear Tomorrow

Mom and I are going to Build a Bear tomorrow…can’t wait…I’ve wanted to go to Build a Bear since I first heard about them (whatever, don’t act like you’re so big and strong/old and mature that you don’t like stuffed animals). I really want to make an Innuit Cow. If they’re out of the Innuit outfit…maybe a fire fighter cow.

Buffalo on Monday

I fly back to Buffalo on Monday…and that’s a wrap kids.

HP Wedding Crew

moocowinthecity 2006-07-20 No Comments

Subject: HP Wedding Crew

Date: Thursday 7/20/06 2:17:00 AM

Okay Folks,

I’ve just finished looking at the Menu for Outback and I figured I should give everyone a “what to expect” as far as price goes.

Appetizers are around $5.00-$8.00 (I don’t often order them, as they’re the size of a meal and then…why order a meal?).

A regular meal (not like, lobster tail) is around $11.00-$18.00 (obviously, the fancier stuff is slightly more pricey) and I think dessert is included in most meals.

Alcoholic drinks are what they are and since it’s a resteraunt, will be slightly more pricey than a regular bar (on a side note, Massachussets has some weird blue laws about bringing alcohol into the hotel room on your own…just a general heads up…however, for our conveience, there’s a bar down in the lobby).

So per person plan on spendinng:

I. Meal with a drink and appetizer: $25.00

II. Meal with a drink or two, no appetizer: $21.00

III. Meal with a soda, no drink, no appetizer: $15.00

So I think it can fit into everyone’s budget providing we stay away from Lobster Tail (and honestly, if we’re having Lobster together, I’d rather it be at my house on The Island at some later date, where I’ll show you how to cook it right…you see, first, you have to chase someone around with the lobster to get it nice and fresh…).

People I have listed as interested are:

Me (myself, and I)

Anne (and crew)

Marian (and crew)

Liz (and leather skirt)

Margot

Of course, my general rule is “play it by ear” so it’s nice to have plans…but they’re always subject to change.

Marian…I hope you’re bringing the rubber chicken…I’m bringing a few myself…

And, time for bed.

G’night all.

HP Wedding Crew

moocowinthecity 2006-07-20 No Comments

Subject: HP Wedding Crew

Date: Thursday 7/20/06 2:17:00 AM

Okay Folks,

I’ve just finished looking at the Menu for Outback and I figured I should give everyone a “what to expect” as far as price goes.

Appetizers are around $5.00-$8.00 (I don’t often order them, as they’re the size of a meal and then…why order a meal?).

A regular meal (not like, lobster tail) is around $11.00-$18.00 (obviously, the fancier stuff is slightly more pricey) and I think dessert is included in most meals.

Alcoholic drinks are what they are and since it’s a resteraunt, will be slightly more pricey than a regular bar (on a side note, Massachussets has some weird blue laws about bringing alcohol into the hotel room on your own…just a general heads up…however, for our conveience, there’s a bar down in the lobby).

So per person plan on spendinng:

I. Meal with a drink and appetizer: $25.00

II. Meal with a drink or two, no appetizer: $21.00

III. Meal with a soda, no drink, no appetizer: $15.00

So I think it can fit into everyone’s budget providing we stay away from Lobster Tail (and honestly, if we’re having Lobster together, I’d rather it be at my house on The Island at some later date, where I’ll show you how to cook it right…you see, first, you have to chase someone around with the lobster to get it nice and fresh…).

People I have listed as interested are:

Me (myself, and I)

Anne (and crew)

Marian (and crew)

Liz (and leather skirt)

Margot

Of course, my general rule is “play it by ear” so it’s nice to have plans…but they’re always subject to change.

Marian…I hope you’re bringing the rubber chicken…I’m bringing a few myself…

And, time for bed.

G’night all.

June 2007…London?

moocowinthecity 2006-07-20 No Comments

Subject: June 2007…London?

Date: Thursday 7/20/06 1:27:00 AM

Okay…so I found out that the IPA offers an examination twice a year (Info can be found here)…the kicker is that as far as I can tell, it’s only offered in London. I don’t think getting funding will be too much of an issue; with grants, I could get funding to play game boy for a year (and let me tell you, a year of pokemon does sound mighty tempting).

But I’m thinking, I have off of Spring Semester 07 since I’ll be graduating in the Fall…and while I don’t have much of a draw to Europe (there’s many more places that are on the list first) I really, really love taking examinations (it’s a sickness, I know)…especially when they come with pieces of paper upon passing (speaking of which, I really need to get work done for my esperanto course).

So maybe June 2007 will be reserved for London. We’ll see =)

June 2007…London?

moocowinthecity 2006-07-20 No Comments

Subject: June 2007…London?

Date: Thursday 7/20/06 1:27:00 AM

Okay…so I found out that the IPA offers an examination twice a year (Info can be found here)…the kicker is that as far as I can tell, it’s only offered in London. I don’t think getting funding will be too much of an issue; with grants, I could get funding to play game boy for a year (and let me tell you, a year of pokemon does sound mighty tempting).

But I’m thinking, I have off of Spring Semester 07 since I’ll be graduating in the Fall…and while I don’t have much of a draw to Europe (there’s many more places that are on the list first) I really, really love taking examinations (it’s a sickness, I know)…especially when they come with pieces of paper upon passing (speaking of which, I really need to get work done for my esperanto course).

So maybe June 2007 will be reserved for London. We’ll see =)

Can I have “a sinus infection with a side of mono” for $300 Alex?

moocowinthecity 2006-07-19 No Comments

Subject: Can I have “a sinus infection with a side of mono” for $300 Alex?

Date: Wednesday 7/19/06 11:30:00 PM

So after calling the doctors office and dealing with them, and then playing a fun and delightful game of phone tag with my insurance company and my insurance broker I finally got my stuff settled to have my Cat Scan tomorrow.

On the phone with my doctor however he goes “Well, after looking at your blood test, I’m pretty sure, like 99.99% sure, that you have Mono” and I was like “Dammit.”

So, that’s the good word.

Eli wants it known that he WOULD have guessed Mono but he only knew it as the Kissing Virus and didn’t know if we also called it that in this country (we do).

Anyways, my doctor wants me to get the Cat Scan tomorrow regardless, “just to be sure” and then I’m coming home and watching movies (Kill Bill II, Clerks, Pulp Fiction again) and Friday I’m going to Build a Bear and making an Innuit Cow.

I hope to be back in Buffalo on Monday; and since I ‘know’ (or am reasonably sure) that it’s Mono, I’ll book my tickets to Buffalo tomorrow.

Doctors Rx: Soup, Rest & Reading.

G’night all =)

Can I have “a sinus infection with a side of mono” for $300 Alex?

moocowinthecity 2006-07-19 No Comments

Subject: Can I have “a sinus infection with a side of mono” for $300 Alex?

Date: Wednesday 7/19/06 11:30:00 PM

So after calling the doctors office and dealing with them, and then playing a fun and delightful game of phone tag with my insurance company and my insurance broker I finally got my stuff settled to have my Cat Scan tomorrow.

On the phone with my doctor however he goes “Well, after looking at your blood test, I’m pretty sure, like 99.99% sure, that you have Mono” and I was like “Dammit.”

So, that’s the good word.

Eli wants it known that he WOULD have guessed Mono but he only knew it as the Kissing Virus and didn’t know if we also called it that in this country (we do).

Anyways, my doctor wants me to get the Cat Scan tomorrow regardless, “just to be sure” and then I’m coming home and watching movies (Kill Bill II, Clerks, Pulp Fiction again) and Friday I’m going to Build a Bear and making an Innuit Cow.

I hope to be back in Buffalo on Monday; and since I ‘know’ (or am reasonably sure) that it’s Mono, I’ll book my tickets to Buffalo tomorrow.

Doctors Rx: Soup, Rest & Reading.

G’night all =)

moocowinthecity 2006-07-19 No Comments

Date: Wednesday 7/19/06 1:34:00 AM

Mood: I need to pee

Adventures in Underwear

So today was fairly uneventful. I realize that my lack of underwear was seriously going to impact my stay down here (as I was planning on returning to Buffalo…where, by now, I probably have over 100 pairs of underwear).

So I went and got two packs of boxers (I really didn’t think Mom should have to be sent on that kind of errand, I mean, I know she’d do it because I wasn’t in the mood to go out, but really, by the time you’re 21 you should be buying your own underwear with your own money instead of describing what kind of underwear you need and sending your poor mother out to get it for you).

Anyways, I appreciate the words of support from all of you. I got to speak to Eli on the phone today which was cool. He doesn’t think I’m anemic and disagrees with my doctor’s assessment. Now, since I have absolutely no background in this kind of thing I can only report what I’m told (which is that my doctor said ‘wow, you’re anemic’…however, I also have no problem taking book on other people’s opinions of what’s going on:

That Said…

“I have to go to the bookies…what do you know that I don’t…bube…there are many things I know that you don’t”

I believe Carrie (irenefinlay) is voting for mumps and she’s very certain that if I were to die of some disease, it would be rare, and foreign, and probably stem from a trip to some bizarre part of the world and/or outer space.

Eli is voting that I’m not Anemic but he doesn’t know what it is either; however he challenges my doctors assertion that I am Anemic because that’s what he’s studying at the moment in his research (for the record, he’s also working with Rat Ears…I make him wash his hands before I come over and play).

I’m voting that I have no idea wtf is going on, but that I feel good after the shot in the ass (not…because it was in the ass, but because of the drugs the shot contained) and that I can be back in Buffalo by next Thursday. I also vote that having a shot in the ass requires one to change their sleeping habit for a night.

Mom is voting that I have the mumps (god dammit!) and then had a relapse of the Mumps again because ‘you’re a student and you never slow down!’ If I do have the mumps as she believes I do, she wants to go into the doctors office and go “I told you so” (‘because he’s such a misogynist!’)

Feel free to add your wager to the pot, winner gets a free pack of green tea.

Anyways, whatever the Doctor injected me with is certainly helping, I’m pretty sure it was a steroid and something else. I do feel better every day (and after literally a month of being sick, that’s a good feeling) buuuut I still can’t go back to Buffalo until I:

a) Know what I had

b) Know what I currently have and

c) Know how I can treat whatever it is I have, and avoid getting it again.

To think, this all started with a ‘sinus infection’

Actually, let me give you the rough time line of events (in terms of Days, it’s not 100% accurate, but it’s close)

Days 1-4 – Don’t go to Doctor because I’m only just getting sick, it will go away on it’s own, why bother…I was raised in a Jewish house…you don’t bother a doctor unless you a) have to or b) are getting his telephone number.

Days 5-8 – Not going away on it’s own. See Physicians Assistant on Day 5, told I’m fine, go home, I’ll be better on my own in a ‘week and a half’. Day 8, See a Doctor. Told I have a sinus infection, receive Z-Pack Script

Days 8-13 – Take Z-Pack, still feel sick

Days 14-16 – (at least, I think it was two days time) do nothing

Days 17-27 – Day 17 See Dr. Carnavele, Then See Dr. Chatrath, Receive Levaquin Script. On Levaquin for 10 Days. Still feel like shit.

Day 28 – Return to New York, instead of Buffalo, from Boston. Carrie Gave me Soup and Tea…Stephen gave me other things that we won’t talk about on LJ.

So, it could turn out that ‘treatment’ is just rest and soup in which case, rock on (no one will be happier than me for an excuse to eat soup and nap). It could mean treatment is something else (medication, etc). In reality, I have no idea.

Yes, I’m going for a cat scan (and I appreciate those who have offered up their cats to stare at me so I don’t have to make an appointment at the radiologists office) I know I had one person tell me “they only do that when it’s serious” but in all honesty, I think my doctor’s just being thorough.

I don’t get worried about medical procedures or doctors visits (to the consternation of some of my friends who freak out at the sight of a needle) mainly because I view myself as a pragmatist.

There’s a problem that I am unequipped (since it isn’t my field) to handle on my own. Therefore, I seek out an expert opinion. The expert then lets me know what the problem is and, if it sounds like it is within reason, I agree and then s/he tells me how to deal with it, and I do. Pretty basic. The only thing that’s gumming up the works is the fact that my insurance company is behaving like an asshat. However, I should be able to get the Cat Scan completed on Thursday, and hopefully see the Doctor on Friday and know what the deal is.

Now, my lymph nodes (or at least, I think that’s what they are) are still swollen…I prefer calling them “those bumpy things” however, I have clean underwear and plenty of books to read and stuff to drink, and who can ask for more.

Not only that, no one in around 100 miles would even THINK of wearing a Red Socks Jersey and that alone is enough to warm my heart…now, if I could just get Mussina and Jeter to warm my bed…if I can only have one, I’ll take Mussina. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. There’s nothing hotter than a Yankee in Pinstripes.

Not a whole lot of exciting things to update folks on…I mean, mostly, I sit in either boxers or pajamas in bed or a recliner, and read…I mean, I think the books are exciting (don’t get me wrong) but I can’t very well go “ohh and Archie had a brilliant move!” because none of you would know what the hell I was talking about.

So that’s it. I’m feeling better though not quite there yet, I’ve had a shot in the ass which was an experience unto itself, I now have clean underwear and I haven’t gotten a paper cut from reading and I won’t know anything until Friday so you now know, as much as I know.

Now…everyone Play Dr. House and we’ll have a good old time seeing who’s right…or, don’t waste your time and do something more entertaining.

Untitled

moocowinthecity 2006-07-19 No Comments

Date: Wednesday 7/19/06 1:34:00 AM

Mood: I need to pee

Adventures in Underwear

So today was fairly uneventful. I realize that my lack of underwear was seriously going to impact my stay down here (as I was planning on returning to Buffalo…where, by now, I probably have over 100 pairs of underwear).

So I went and got two packs of boxers (I really didn’t think Mom should have to be sent on that kind of errand, I mean, I know she’d do it because I wasn’t in the mood to go out, but really, by the time you’re 21 you should be buying your own underwear with your own money instead of describing what kind of underwear you need and sending your poor mother out to get it for you).

Anyways, I appreciate the words of support from all of you. I got to speak to Eli on the phone today which was cool. He doesn’t think I’m anemic and disagrees with my doctor’s assessment. Now, since I have absolutely no background in this kind of thing I can only report what I’m told (which is that my doctor said ‘wow, you’re anemic’…however, I also have no problem taking book on other people’s opinions of what’s going on:

That Said…

“I have to go to the bookies…what do you know that I don’t…bube…there are many things I know that you don’t”

I believe Carrie (irenefinlay) is voting for mumps and she’s very certain that if I were to die of some disease, it would be rare, and foreign, and probably stem from a trip to some bizarre part of the world and/or outer space.

Eli is voting that I’m not Anemic but he doesn’t know what it is either; however he challenges my doctors assertion that I am Anemic because that’s what he’s studying at the moment in his research (for the record, he’s also working with Rat Ears…I make him wash his hands before I come over and play).

I’m voting that I have no idea wtf is going on, but that I feel good after the shot in the ass (not…because it was in the ass, but because of the drugs the shot contained) and that I can be back in Buffalo by next Thursday. I also vote that having a shot in the ass requires one to change their sleeping habit for a night.

Mom is voting that I have the mumps (god dammit!) and then had a relapse of the Mumps again because ‘you’re a student and you never slow down!’ If I do have the mumps as she believes I do, she wants to go into the doctors office and go “I told you so” (‘because he’s such a misogynist!’)

Feel free to add your wager to the pot, winner gets a free pack of green tea.

Anyways, whatever the Doctor injected me with is certainly helping, I’m pretty sure it was a steroid and something else. I do feel better every day (and after literally a month of being sick, that’s a good feeling) buuuut I still can’t go back to Buffalo until I:

a) Know what I had

b) Know what I currently have and

c) Know how I can treat whatever it is I have, and avoid getting it again.

To think, this all started with a ‘sinus infection’

Actually, let me give you the rough time line of events (in terms of Days, it’s not 100% accurate, but it’s close)

Days 1-4 – Don’t go to Doctor because I’m only just getting sick, it will go away on it’s own, why bother…I was raised in a Jewish house…you don’t bother a doctor unless you a) have to or b) are getting his telephone number.

Days 5-8 – Not going away on it’s own. See Physicians Assistant on Day 5, told I’m fine, go home, I’ll be better on my own in a ‘week and a half’. Day 8, See a Doctor. Told I have a sinus infection, receive Z-Pack Script

Days 8-13 – Take Z-Pack, still feel sick

Days 14-16 – (at least, I think it was two days time) do nothing

Days 17-27 – Day 17 See Dr. Carnavele, Then See Dr. Chatrath, Receive Levaquin Script. On Levaquin for 10 Days. Still feel like shit.

Day 28 – Return to New York, instead of Buffalo, from Boston. Carrie Gave me Soup and Tea…Stephen gave me other things that we won’t talk about on LJ.

So, it could turn out that ‘treatment’ is just rest and soup in which case, rock on (no one will be happier than me for an excuse to eat soup and nap). It could mean treatment is something else (medication, etc). In reality, I have no idea.

Yes, I’m going for a cat scan (and I appreciate those who have offered up their cats to stare at me so I don’t have to make an appointment at the radiologists office) I know I had one person tell me “they only do that when it’s serious” but in all honesty, I think my doctor’s just being thorough.

I don’t get worried about medical procedures or doctors visits (to the consternation of some of my friends who freak out at the sight of a needle) mainly because I view myself as a pragmatist.

There’s a problem that I am unequipped (since it isn’t my field) to handle on my own. Therefore, I seek out an expert opinion. The expert then lets me know what the problem is and, if it sounds like it is within reason, I agree and then s/he tells me how to deal with it, and I do. Pretty basic. The only thing that’s gumming up the works is the fact that my insurance company is behaving like an asshat. However, I should be able to get the Cat Scan completed on Thursday, and hopefully see the Doctor on Friday and know what the deal is.

Now, my lymph nodes (or at least, I think that’s what they are) are still swollen…I prefer calling them “those bumpy things” however, I have clean underwear and plenty of books to read and stuff to drink, and who can ask for more.

Not only that, no one in around 100 miles would even THINK of wearing a Red Socks Jersey and that alone is enough to warm my heart…now, if I could just get Mussina and Jeter to warm my bed…if I can only have one, I’ll take Mussina. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. There’s nothing hotter than a Yankee in Pinstripes.

Not a whole lot of exciting things to update folks on…I mean, mostly, I sit in either boxers or pajamas in bed or a recliner, and read…I mean, I think the books are exciting (don’t get me wrong) but I can’t very well go “ohh and Archie had a brilliant move!” because none of you would know what the hell I was talking about.

So that’s it. I’m feeling better though not quite there yet, I’ve had a shot in the ass which was an experience unto itself, I now have clean underwear and I haven’t gotten a paper cut from reading and I won’t know anything until Friday so you now know, as much as I know.

Now…everyone Play Dr. House and we’ll have a good old time seeing who’s right…or, don’t waste your time and do something more entertaining.

Health Update

moocowinthecity 2006-07-18 No Comments

Subject: Health Update

Date: Tuesday 7/18/06 1:38:00 AM

Mood: blech

Music: The Colbert Report

Location: Plainview, Long Island, New York

I’m just going to copy the E-mail I sent out to those I work with/have a need to know why I’m not available (I just think it’s sort of shitty to not be available for a while and not tell people why they can’t get in touch with you). Anyways:

Date: Mon, 17 Jul 2006 21:20:51 -0700 (PDT)

From: “Matthew L. Schwartz”

Subject: Health Update/Out of Office

To: “undisclosed recipients”

Dear Friends & Colleagues,

I don’t often share this level of personal information

with folks but I thought this might be important to

share so I can explain to you while I’ll be

unavailable over the next week or two.

I have been sick for around thirty days, and after two

doses of antibiotics (first Z-Pack, then Levaquin) I

still felt sick. The pinnacle of this came when I was

on a photo shoot this weekend in Boston and on Sunday

had to take an emergency train home to NYC because I

felt ill and more importantly, I was in pain.

Upon arriving in NYC I was scheduled for an

appointment with a specialist whom I saw today. After

being told that I was anemic, having two vials of

blood drawn, receiving some injections, having an EKG,

going through a series of X-Rays I was told that I

then had to get a Cat Scan of my Lungs with Contrast

and that they’ll know what’s going on with me when

they get the Cat Scan and the Blood Tests Back. This

means that the earliest I can return to Buffalo is

this coming Monday, but in all honesty it really

depends on what the doctors say.

That said, I won’t be in contact very much via

telephone, as it hurts to speak. I will however be

reachable via E-mail (please allow me some time to

respond) and I will keep you abreast of the situation

as it stands.

For those of you with whom I share a seat on a

committee or an organization, please forward me

meeting minutes and keep me informed of what’s going

on. I hate being out of the loop.

I hope to return to Buffalo very, very soon and I look

forward to seeing all of you again in short order. If

you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to ask.

All my best,

Matthew

—

Matthew L. Schwartz, CPhT

Member: American Translators Association

Interpretation, Literary & Medical Divisions

Concentration in Arabic Translation & Interpretation at the

Department of Linguistics, State University of New York at Buffalo

So that’s the deal and where things stand. For some reason, despite being faxed proof that I’m a student about 7 or 8 times, my insurance company is still having issues, so the earliest I can make the Cat Scan appointment is Wednesday; which means I’m currently home, on Long Island, resting. Mostly sleeping, which as far as my dog is concerned is the best activity ever and I have to say, I’m inclined to agree.

So hopefully Thursday I’ll be able to get the Cat Scan, Friday see the Doctor and know what’s going on. I’ll keep everyone updated. Please, don’t be overly concerned. While it is incredibly shitty to not know what’s going on (and, overall, to feel like crap), I have awesome medical care here on The Island, with Doctors who know me (and who have worked with me) and once I know what’s going on I can tackle it head on…the trick is just to figure out what’s going on and I leave that to my Doctor.

Anyways, bed time.